1.	How would you describe a close friend?

2.	The second greatest commandment in the Bible involves relationships
                   (Matthew 22:39).   Today, we're going to
                   concentrate on how we fulfill that command in
                   marriage, parenting, church relationships, work
                   relationships, social relationships and all other
                   contacts we have with other people.

3.	Most of us have not been trained in relationship development and
                  thus we do not reach our full potential in our
                  ability to relate to each other.  

4.	Guy Greenfield's book, We Need Each Other.  (Baker Book House,
                  1984),  establishes some new frontiers in practical
                  human relations.  Our lessons will be drawn from his
                  insights based on Matthew 22:39.

 DISCUSSION

I.	The concept of closeness.

	 A.	Loneliness, isolation and alienation are common experience in
                   		American society

  		1.	Why is this the case?

  		2.	What are some of the negative consequences of superficial and
                   			non-existent relationships?


 	B.	The need for closeness.

           	1.	Biblical examples.
                   		a. 	The holy kiss (Rom. 16:16; I Cor. 16:20; 2 Cor.
                   			13:12; I Thess. 5:26). 
                   		b.	  The prodigal son (Luke 15:20).
                   		c.	  The elders at Ephesus    (Acts 20:37)

            	2.	How can we practice closeness in our culture?

II.	Levels of relating. (Greenfield. p. 17.

	 A.	Level 1.  Avoidance.

 	B.	Level 2.  Greeting.

	 C.	Level 3.  Separate Interests

	 D.	Level 4.  Common Interests

	 E.	Level 5.  Social Interactions

	 F.	Level 6.  Caring 

	 G.	Level 7.  Sharing

	 H.	Level 8.  Intimacy

III.	Determining the depth of our relationships.

	 A.	What is meant by depth?

	 B.	"People who have no closeness, no depth in any of their
                         relationships tend to be people who are unhappy,
                    	lonely, critical, uncooperative, even sometimes hostile and mean."
	            (Greenfield p. 22).

  		1.	Can you think of Biblical examples which would confirm this
		            insight?  

 		 2.	Why are some people afraid to have deep relationships with
   	                        others?

  		3.	What prevents us from progressing to levels 6, 7 and 8 in our
		             relationships?  

  		4.	How do fault finding, judgmentalism and the habit of criticizing
		            others indicate a relationship deficiency?

 	C.	Discuss the implications of 2 Cor. 7:16 and I Thess. 2:7-8.

IV.	Suggestions for deepening relationships between husbands and
                   wives.

 	A.	Concentrate on asking "How do you feel?" rather than "What do you
                   	think?"

	 B.	Touch.  Back rubs have an amazing capacity to improve
                   	relationships.

	 C.	Avoid "put down humor"  and telling crude jokes about each other
                   	n public.

	 D.	Express appreciation.

	 E.	Give attention to little things like putting the toilet seat down
                   	(if you're a man) or packing your husband's
	            suitcase if he has to take a business trip.

	 F.	Go out on dates regularly.  Enjoy unhurried dinners.

	 G.	Take Walks together

	 H.	Listen

	 I.	Support one another.


 CONCLUSION

 PORTRAIT OF A FRIEND

Consider this portrait of a friend:
When things don't come out right, he comes in.
When none of your dreams come true, she remains true.
He never looks for your money except when you've lost it.
She never gets in your way except to clear it for you.
Nothing is more important to him that making you important.
She's in your corner when you are cornered.
He turns up when you get turned down.
All she wants in return for your helping hand is a handshake.
He never insists on seeing you except when nobody else wants to.
The only way she sponges off you is to absorb some of your troubles.
When you're taking bows, he bows out. You can do anything with her
friendship except buy it-- or sell it. He makes you realize that
having a friend is like having an extra life. All she asks of your
friendship is the privilege of deserving it.
 -James Plietz-

The community had raised more than $3,000 to help send the teen-agers and their message of abstinence to New York City and the "Montel Williams show next week.

But Carol Lester, who sponsors "A Hope for Teens," a local volunteer program that encourages teenagers to say no to sex, said she was told this week that the group's appearance on the show had been canceled.

Lester said she was told the producers had decided instead to have all sexually active teenagers on the show.

All donations are being returned, she said.

"I was really disappointed, but feel this is something we can learn from, and that we need to go on and keep spreading the message that abstinence is the best choice." said Kendrea Muldrew, a member of the group.

Another member, Jennifer Jones, lamented the change in the show's focus.

"There will be no one there to support abstinence," she said, "It makes it look like they are supporting sexual activity. That puts America in a deeper rut."

Arkansas Democrat-Gazette. March 16, 1996

NEXT WEEK'S FEATURE ARTICLE: "GENDER ROLES"